My escape from the world of Norse gods began with a haircut. It landed me in a fictional landscape of comic book heroes.
“OH MY GOD!” a sixteen-year-old high school student yelled when she saw me on Monday morning. “You aren’t Thor anymore! You look like the hulk!” she screamed so loud I was sure the entire school could hear. “Or a huge version of Mr. Calhoun,” she said nonchalantly, and then moved on.
My recent haircut, although it was quite a change, got me thinking of (and was actually inspired by) the question: why is it that we tie up so much of our identity in how we look?
I decided to grow my hair out immediately after finishing my football career. The main reason? So that I wouldn’t look like a football player anymore. I was tired of having the identity of a football player, and I wanted a fresh start. The easiest way for me to get away from the prejudice (yes, it is found on the Brown University campus somewhere) I found against football players was to change my look. Unfortunately, my giant frame and turkey-burger calves weren’t going to change. So my hair was an easy option. The other reason was simply because I was afraid I was soon to go bald, so I thought “I might as well enjoy hair while I have it!”
“OH MY GOD!” a sixteen-year-old high school student yelled when she saw me on Monday morning. “You aren’t Thor anymore! You look like the hulk!” she screamed so loud I was sure the entire school could hear. “Or a huge version of Mr. Calhoun,” she said nonchalantly, and then moved on.
My recent haircut, although it was quite a change, got me thinking of (and was actually inspired by) the question: why is it that we tie up so much of our identity in how we look?
I decided to grow my hair out immediately after finishing my football career. The main reason? So that I wouldn’t look like a football player anymore. I was tired of having the identity of a football player, and I wanted a fresh start. The easiest way for me to get away from the prejudice (yes, it is found on the Brown University campus somewhere) I found against football players was to change my look. Unfortunately, my giant frame and turkey-burger calves weren’t going to change. So my hair was an easy option. The other reason was simply because I was afraid I was soon to go bald, so I thought “I might as well enjoy hair while I have it!”
Well, nearly five years later, my hair was still long, and that had become part of my identity. It identified me as a hippy, an environmentalist, an adventurer, a caveman, a mad scientist, and a myriad of other personas. I realized that I had become attached to my hair because it was tied to that personality – it had become a part of me.
One of my big soapboxes in life is about exhibiting your own personality and being authentic (being your highest self) no matter what the occasion, and looking for that in others as well. I say this because I don’t want to work with someone who wears a suit to work and is mean and dumb (sorry if that came off as harsh). Instead, I want to work with someone who is passionate about what they do, smart, and exudes energy and inspiration upon others. I don’t care what they look like! I want this to be a more prominent value in our culture, so it is a battle I choose to fight.
Well, I realized that I wanted to work on that very thing – just being me. Yes, I feel that having long hair helped me fight that battle in a way. But at the same time, I felt like it had become too much of a part of my identity and in some ways, my statement. So, I decided that I needed to work on being me no matter what I look like, so I first shaved my beard and kept a mustache. Then, I just cut the whole damn beard and all the hair, too. Damn it feels good.
Well, I realized that I wanted to work on that very thing – just being me. Yes, I feel that having long hair helped me fight that battle in a way. But at the same time, I felt like it had become too much of a part of my identity and in some ways, my statement. So, I decided that I needed to work on being me no matter what I look like, so I first shaved my beard and kept a mustache. Then, I just cut the whole damn beard and all the hair, too. Damn it feels good.
What about your looks has become part of your personality? Do you think it affects you in a negative way at times? How can we, as a society, find a healthy balance for self-image? Let me know your story.
Just for amusement sake, here are a few funny images I found of myself. Enjoy :)
Just for amusement sake, here are a few funny images I found of myself. Enjoy :)